Do As We Say, Not As They Did

Do As We Say, Not As They Did

An unfiltered dating podcast all about love, sex, relationships, and all the ways humans are sometimes really bad at them. Dr. NerdLove and Dr. Liz Powell break down what not do, and what actually works.

Recent Episodes

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The ADHD Relationship Guide That Nobody Gave Us Ep. 31
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Oct. 28, 2026

The ADHD Relationship Guide That Nobody Gave Us

Is it love at first sight, or did your ADHD brain just find its latest hyperfixation? In this episode of Do As We Say, Not As They Did, Harris O'Malley and Dr. Liz Powell are getting personal about their experiences with ADHD, from being diagnosed as adults to recognizing how it shaped their relationships long before they had a name for it. They're talking about the difference between love and limerence, why new relationship energy (NRE) can make forever feel like a fantastic idea (for three w
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Online Dating Is Weird. This Baby-Making Site Is Weirder. Ep. 30
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Oct. 13, 2026

Online Dating Is Weird. This Baby-Making Site Is Weirder.

Have you ever noticed how much online dating advice focuses less on solving real problems and more on inventing solutions to problems that don't exist? In this episode of Do As We Say, Not As They Did, Harris O'Malley and Dr. Liz Powell jump right into terrible dating advice with questionable statistics that make it sound like men shouldn't even try to date, and a dating/sugar-baby/baby-making website that seems like it could only appeal to Elon Musk or Nick Cannon. First, they're setting the
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Maybe Your Looks Aren’t the Reason You’re Single Ep. 29
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Oct. 6, 2026

Maybe Your Looks Aren’t the Reason You’re Single

Why are people so worried about the attractiveness gap? What about the kindness gap? The “I can do chores around the house” gap? The emotional processing gap? In this episode of Do As We Say, Not As They Did, Dr. Liz Powell and Harris O’Malley read from Playboy Magazine. The article in question? “We Asked the Women of the SEC About Shrekking.” And yes, SEC refers to the Southeastern Conference, not the Securities and Exchange Commission (but it’s an easy mistake to make 😉). As Liz and Harris d
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How Aging Changes Your Relationships w/ Wendy Strgar Ep. 28
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Sept. 30, 2026

How Aging Changes Your Relationships w/ Wendy Strgar

We’re all going to get older, so why does our culture treat aging like one of the worst things that can happen to us and our desire? In this episode of Do As We Say, Not As They Did, Harris O’Malley and Dr. Liz Powell are joined by Wendy Strgar, founder of Good Clean Love, women’s health pioneer, author, and educator, for an unfiltered conversation about menopause, changing bodies, mismatched desire, and intimacy in long-term relationships. Through stories from r/Menopause and r/MenopauseShedFor
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Has The Internet Made Dating Worse? Ep. 27
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Sept. 16, 2026

Has The Internet Made Dating Worse?

Women told men to stop approaching them, but now they’re upset that men aren’t taking charge? So what are men even supposed to do?! 🫩 In this episode of Do As We Say, Not As They Did, Dr. Liz Powell and Harris O’Malley dig into a post from r/DatingOver30 titled, “I Feel Gaslit by Modern Dating. Am I Completely Wrong?” And, yes... he kind of is. First things first, women changing their dating preferences isn’t what gaslighting is. Secondly, this sounds less like modern dating suddenly changed
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Are Men Actually Lonelier than Women? Ep. 26
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Sept. 9, 2026

Are Men Actually Lonelier than Women?

Is the male loneliness epidemic a real thing, or just something the internet won’t stop talking about? In this episode of Do As We Say, Not As They Did, Harris O’Malley and Dr. Liz Powell are getting right to the point: men are definitely lonely…but research suggests that they aren’t uniquely lonely. If women are just as likely to be lonely as men are, what’s the real predictor of loneliness? Money. Now that doesn’t mean there isn’t a gendered aspect to the problem. Along with ranting about t
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About the Hosts

Harris O'Malley Profile Photo
Harris O'Malley

Harris O’Malley is an internationally recognized relationship expert, dating coach and syndicated advice columnist.

Famous for his ability to simplify complex dating dilemmas and solve the toughest relationship problems, he has long been sought after for coaching and advice.

Harris and his work have been featured in or on Nightline, Fusion TV, Vice, New York Magazine, The Wall Street Journal, The Washington Post, The Harvard Business Journal, The Guardian, CBC’s Out In The Open, Buzzfeed, Wired, Think Progress, Raw Story, Slate, Boing Boing, The Good Men Project, The Daily Dot, Mel Magazine, Lifehacker, Kotaku and many, many more.

Dr. Liz Powell Profile Photo
Dr. Liz Powell

Dr. Liz believes that Great Sex Can Change the World. They are the author of Building Open Relationships, a sex educator, and licensed psychologist (CA 27871, OR 3068) specializing in queer, kinky, and non-monogamous relationships. Dr. Liz has helped folks of all kinds become more confident in who they are and communicate more effectively with their partners. You can learn more about Dr. Liz at DrLizPowell.com, Sex-Positive Psych on YouTube, and @DrLizPowell on Instagram & Twitter.